NOTE: On September 28, I delivered a program titled "Communication Ethics" at the Ethics Conference of Investment Management Consultants Association (www.IMCA.org). I taught a full house of financial advisors how to read people for the purpose of communicating with them more clearly. That is step one in becoming a Relationship Manager. If your firm does not employ a designated Relationship Manager, you could be missing out on more money than you're making. This article is a must-read for anyone wanting to succeed in the financial industry.

Quick story 1. About five years ago, I taught Face Values to the sales force of a technology firm in Dallas. It was a small group, about six or eight people, and they all sat around a table wide-eyed as they realized I was teaching them how to read the minds of people who were important to them – their team members, colleagues, managers and clients. They were fascinated with two specific strategies:

  1. They could assign a specific sales person to specific types of clients. In other words, just by "reading" their clients, they could give vastly better service and simplify their lives. For example, clients who want to jump to bottom-line information just do not want to waste time. They want to get it done now. They needed to deal with a sales person who understood that personality type and communication style.
  2. They could work more effectively with the other people in the firm, specifically the people they had to deal with on a daily basis. In other words, by "reading" the executive team and software engineers, they could build better working relationships and simplify their lives. Once they understood how to "read" and communicate with the types of people who become executives, engineers and entrepreneurs, their morale shot up and their stress level plummeted – plus, their job satisfaction and success sky rocketed.

I tell you that story because many advisors are process-oriented (analytical). They enjoy solving complex problems and developing strategies. Or, they are bottom-line focused (driver). They enjoy making decisions.

The downside – analyticals and drivers are the two Types that stumble or fail most often in the are of relationship management. Each type inherently focuses on something other than relationships. That spells "failure" if the Relationship Manager is either a Driver or an Analytical.

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Quick story 2. Each year, we conduct a program at the Athens (Georgia) Insurance Expo. The management gives us the best booth in the exhibit hall. High visibility and lots of foot traffic. They love us there because on our table is a sign saying, "Face Reading." Within fifteen minutes, we have people lined up ten to fifteen deep waiting for me to read their faces. It is science, but it's not rocket science. Anyone can learn to do it. If you want to build better (more profitable) relationships with your clients, you can learn to do it, too.

Fact 1. Every advisor serves as a Relationship Manager, but not all succeed at it.

Fact 2. All assistants serve as Relationship Practitioners, ditto.

Fact 3. Very few advisors or assistants know how to build better relationships.

Fact 4. Most advisors assume clients understand their natural way of communicating.

Fact 5. Most advisors miscommunicate with 75% of their prospects.

Fact 6. Most assistants focus on time management rather than building client relationships. Thus, they tend to limit the quality of your client relationships.

Conclusion: You connect naturally with only 25% of the people you meet. So – if you want to make more money and simplify your life, you must learn how to read people. You must learn how to succeed as a Relationship Manager.

Let's look at you. Let's help you determine how much you know about building better client relationships. Take this short, simple survey and see how well you do. Then, give it to your assistant(s).

Rate Your Connectivity – Phase One

The list below contains elements that are vital in purposeful client communication. How well do you know the skills for building meaningful client relationships? On a scale of 0-10 please rate your level of understanding and expertise. A rating of zero means you have no knowledge of or experience in the subject. A rating of 10 means you possess real expertise on that subject. There are no 11s and the highest possible score is 100.

  1. You can explain the concept of Psychographics.
  2. You can give the simple definition of a "meta program".
  3. You know definition of "subjective perception".
  4. You can name the five levels of rapport and explain each.
  5. You can name the four basic personality types and give examples of each.
  6. You can list words that each personality type is likely to use.
  7. You can discuss the non-verbal behaviors of each personality type.
  8. You can list the meta programs that make up each personality type.
  9. You know how to tell if a client is process-oriented or not.
  10. You know how to tell if a client wants recommendations or not.

Pretty simple. The point of that little survey is to help you learn what you know (and don't know) about building relationships – purposefully building meaningful, profitable client relationships. Anyone who works with people or is charged with selling should be an expert in those things. If you're not an expert in them, it shows categorically that you don't focus on people. I've never met an advisor, consultant or coach who could score a 100. In fact, I've never met an advisor who could score 50. In any classroom in America, a 50 equates to an "F" – a failing grade. Is that good enough for you? Consider that you probably connect with only 25% of the people you meet. That means you are chasing away 75% of your potential new clients.

Conclusion

If you want to learn how to build better client relationships – and do it on purpose – you must learn some better skills.

Quick test – If you're reading this article in an office, look into the face of someone near you. What can you determine about that person, just from looking? Can you see what that person values and what his or her decision-making style is – just from looking? That's just a simple test. If you can't read people when the chips are down, you're probably sabotaging your own business.

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