Does the word “negotiation” make your blood pressure rise? Whether you’re negotiating the biggest deal of your life or where to go for lunch, much of life is negotiation. And, as in a game of chess, the negotiator with the best strategy usually wins. One careless move and the game is lost.

“Even when faced with the most daunting of deals, regarding the act of negotiation as a ‘game’ may alleviate the apprehension and give you the confidence to make power plays that will ultimately facilitate your desired result,” says contract-negotiation expert Eldonna Lewis-Fernandez. Here, from her book Think Like a Negotiator, are the 7 most common negotiating mistakes:

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