A social event for mingling with top prospects and centers-of-influence (COIs) can be a valuable referral opportunity. For example, a client might arrange a golf outing to help you meet friends who are attractive prospects. Or, you could be invited to a dinner or club function arranged by clients who belong.
Business etiquette manuals say that these occasions are not the time to "talk shop." But that doesn't mean that you can't try to sell yourself in these showcase opportunities.
In a social referral, there are two primary purposes: 1) convince prospects that you are a true professional; and 2) continue to get to know the prospect(s) better. You can accomplish both by staying within a few guidelines:
Recommended For You
#1: Ask questions and identify commonalities. Show interest in the COI, network or referred individual by asking questions. Try to learn about families, work, activities, lifestyles, hobbies and personal connections. Focus on identifying mutual friends and common interests.
#2: Reinforce your positive qualities in action. Determine which positive qualities the referrer communicated about you in making the referral or arranging the event, and then reinforce them. For example, if a client has referred you by emphasizing that you are a fierce competitor and you are invited to play a round of golf, be a fierce competitor on the course. If a referrer has emphasized that you are a good listener, listen attentively.
#3: Offer some ideas, if requested. It's okay to offer financial or investment ideas in a social referral setting if they are requested. But don't belabor them. Indicate that the ideas are worth exploring in a business setting.
#4: Plan key points to mention. Anticipate what you want to tell prospects about yourself (or your business) if invited, and plan the key points you want to mention. Make sure it doesn't sound scripted, like words from a marketing brochure. Honesty and humility go a long way in these settings.
#5: Invite conversations about social and business acquaintances, networks and connections. This is valuable information to learn about any referral. Just draw the line in discussing confidential details of your own clients, including family or social lives.
#6: Follow up by phone. Faces in a crowd tend to blur after a few days, so it's best to follow-up social referrals with phone calls, requesting personal appointments, within a few days.
#7: Consider follow-up via social media. You may want to follow up social referral events by communicating with prospects on social media. For ideas on increasing referrals with social media see "4 rules to increase referrals with social media."
© 2025 ALM Global, LLC, All Rights Reserved. Request academic re-use from www.copyright.com. All other uses, submit a request to [email protected]. For more information visit Asset & Logo Licensing.