Being the new kid in school is one of life's most traumatizing experiences. How tough will my teacher be? Do I have to eat lunch by myself? Will anyone play with me at recess?

Guess what? Even the most seasoned employees can feel exactly the same way on their first day on a new job as they meet new people, learn different procedures and immerse themselves in an unfamiliar corporate culture.

Doing a few simple things, from management to human resources to coworkers, can smooth the transition and make new hires feel right at home.

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1. Implement the plan

Any time a new person is hired, simply take the welcoming plan off the shelf and put it to work. What? You don't have a plan? Few businesses do.

Starting with your next hire, ask such questions as "What was it like during your first day and week?" and "What could others have done to make you feel more comfortable, accepted and appreciated?" Use these questions to develop a detailed plan for bringing a new person into your organization. After the plan is developed and in writing, have everyone involved implement the plan whenever a new employee arrives.

2. Jump-start the process

Filling out endless stacks of paperwork is one of the most dreaded parts of the first day on the job, for HR as well as the employee.

Why not let them fill out as much as possible, either electronically or on paper, before they start? After all, they are much more likely to have access to Social Security numbers, bank account information and other key details while at home.

When you send this information, also include company background; literature about your product or service; policies and procedures; an employee handbook; training materials; reference materials; an on-boarding schedule; and a welcome letter.

3. Be the greeter

Few things are more intimidating for new employees than to show up early, have the receptionist show them to their desk and then sit there with no one to speak with and nothing to do.

Someone (preferably their manager) needs to be waiting in the lobby to greet them when they arrive. Be positive and let them know how excited you are to welcome them to the team. Then offer a cup of coffee and show them to their desk.

4. Have the office ready

A bare desk shoved into a corner probably is not going to convey the message that you are excited about a new employee and have put a lot of thought into their arrival.

The new-hire's work area should be clean, prepared, organized and set up with everything they need (computer, phone, supplies, business cards and file cabinets) to do their job. Then show them where supplies are located and how to requisition an item not in stock.

5. Plug in

Speaking of offices, one of the biggest challenges for any new employee is learning new computer systems and how to use the office phones and message systems. Be sure electronic equipment not only has been set up in advance but also that it is working properly. Make user guides and tutorials readily accessible.

Better yet, schedule an hour with a member of the IT staff to bring them up to speed, set up passwords and answer any questions.

6. Use a sherpa

High-altitude climbs rely on Sherpas, natives of the region who know the mountain intimately and can help them find the best routes and avoid missteps.

Smart employers do the same. Assign new employees a "buddy" to offer guidance and support, and answer informal questions that may not be covered in the handbook. Better yet, make it more than one Sherpa, both to make a new acquaintance and add a new perspective. Just use common sense – you don't want the office whiner or gossip to be the go-to source.

7. Show, not tell

Depending on the size of your business, a new employee will meet dozens if not hundreds of coworkers on the first day. Many of them will remember their name and give them a friendly greeting in the halls, but it will be impossible for the new hire to keep track of all of them.

The best way to put a name with a face is to show them the face. Provide a collage with the photos of managers and their immediate coworkers. Make it fun by including personal information such as family members, pets or hobbies. Even better, you can add the new employee to the collage and use it again for the next new hire.

8. Introduce the formal culture

Every business has a distinct DNA that likely was set in place by its founders and has evolved over time. Some companies have captured their mission and ways of doing things in writing, and many have not.

Either way, be sure to immerse new employees in this formal culture. Educate them about company history, what makes the business special, how it is perceived in the marketplace and how they fit into the culture. As they buy into the corporate culture, they will become your best ambassadors among their social networks.

9. …and the informal culture

A company's formal culture usually comes from the top down, although it is influenced by everyone in the organization. However, every workplace also has a less-formal culture that percolates from the bottom up.

Any employee who isn't part of this culture will feel like an outsider. Let them know who organizes the softball team, plans holiday parties and instigates practical jokes. And make sure those employees are sensitive about including everyone. Nothing says "welcome" like being the victim of a harmless practical joke or being asked to help plan an event.

 

10. Tour the office

Although this may be the oldest tactic in the playbook, it remains essential. At the very least, be sure to show new hires how to find the HR department, restrooms, break rooms, printers, copiers and other essential areas. The rest can come later.

An easy-to-read map can be invaluable. Be sure to include the location of conference rooms and their coworkers' offices.

11. Have a power lunch

This is another tried-and-true idea, but no one seems lonelier than a new employee eating lunch by herself at her desk or in the corner of the break room. The manager and as many immediate co-workers as possible should take them a favorite local restaurant on their first day – and it wouldn't break the company to pick everyone's tab.

12. Spread out the paperwork

Regardless of how much paper work an employee fills out in advance, there will always be more. Everyone understands this is both necessary and important, but at least spread it over a few days so they won't spend their first day with their eyes glazed over. Try to assign them some real work on the first day so they can feel they are contributing.

 

13. End on a high note

You enthusiastically greeted your new employee, showed her the ropes and took her to lunch with the gang. Now what?

If everyone goes back to their offices, close the doors and gets back to work, it will be a long afternoon for the new hire. Give her a project she can sink her teeth into for a few hours. Check back with her at the end of the day, ask how everything went and thank her for helping out. You want her to come back tomorrow feeling like part of the team.

14. Remember the family

Any time you hire a new employee, you also indirectly hire his or her family. You are asking that person to spend 40 hours a week (often more) with you instead of them. You are taking on partiial responsibility for funding their health care and retirement.

Why not make a small gesture to thank them for sharing their husband, wife or father? A gift basket, flowers or gift card to a favorite restarurant can go a long way toward buildling a postiive, long-lasting relationship.

Photo: Associated Press

15. Take a bite of the Apple

What business would not like to have the successful track record of Apple? Every company is different, but look for a way to modify the greeting it uses to both welcome and challenge new employees.

There's work, and there's your life's work.

The kind of work that has your fingerprints all over it. The kind of work that you'd never compromise on. That you'd sacrifice a weekend for. You can do that kind of work at Apple. People don't come here to play it safe. They come here to swim in the deep end.

They want their work to add up to something.

Something big. Something that couldn't happen anywhere else.

Welcome to Apple.

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Alan Goforth

Alan Goforth is a freelance writer in suburban Kansas City. In addition to freelancing for several publications, he has written a dozen books about sports and other topics.