How employers can design a return from maternity leave to support working moms

When I found out I was pregnant with my first child, I was just a few short weeks into a big new job, and I was terrified. I instantly felt as though I didn’t “deserve” my job and that my managers and colleagues would be disappointed in me. As the daughter of a stay at home mother, I had no clue what working motherhood should look like. I was thrilled to become a parent – but had no idea what to do at work.

When I finally got the nerve to tell my coworkers, after months of hiding my pregnancy at work, I was instantly relieved at their support. But privately, I approached my mentor – also a working parent – and told her how worried I was about how I would balance everything, and how I wasn’t sure what working motherhood would look like for me.

What my mentor and colleagues did next was, it turned out, quite extraordinary. I worked for a relatively large organization, and she gathered fellow working mothers at all stages of their careers and parenting journey into a makeshift tribe for me. These women made themselves available to answer questions, give support, and just tell me about what they had done or were doing to balance working motherhood.

My experience with my tribe was so transformative that when I went to write my book, Mommy Goes to Work, I instinctively understood that I couldn’t do it alone. I tested the book with 100 working parents, caregivers and kids to get their feedback and learn more about what kind of story would make the experience of working motherhood easier for them. And during that testing period, I learned a lot about what moms wished employers would do to better support them. 

Returning to work after maternity leave is one of the most difficult moments of any working mother’s career, and it’s an extremely vulnerable one for employees. And how her employer treats her during that time is absolutely a factor in what happens next.

Over time, I’ve worked for a number of other companies and gone on to have a second child. I’ve continued the tradition of building a tribe around me to create a support system, and I’ve noticed that the employers where moms feel most valued often take some simple steps towards easing their transition back to work after maternity leave. Here are some ways that mentors, managers and employers can help support moms on their return.

Forge connections

Whether it is formal or informal, employers can encourage connections or mentorships among working mothers with the understanding that working motherhood is a unique and often difficult role to play. I found that my mom tribe made me a stronger, better employee because I was able to see others in action at different stages of their parenting journeys, and be reassured that I could do it too.

Give extra support during transitions

Coming back to work after leave is challenging. An oft-cited study indicates that more than a third of working mothers felt so isolated and unsupported when they returned to work that they wanted to quit. Only 18% felt happy and confident about work. This means that employers have a lot of work to do in order to retain working mothers and get their best work right upon their return from leave. Providing special gifts, a great lactation benefits program or extra flexibility upon return are some ways companies can help ease the transition. Making the new moms working for you feel less alone and more supported goes a long way towards their loyalty and productivity.

Design an experience with inflection points in mind

Research on experience design has indicated often that people don’t remember their entire experience; they remember the beginning, end and some peaks in between. So companies can create a maternity leave and return experience that takes this into account to maximize engagement and benefit.

If you ask any working mom about their first day returning to work, many of them will remember that. A lot of people in our research mentioned mixed feelings – excitement about going to work, but guilt about leaving their kids. For some, it felt as though they were abandoning their kids for a selfish reason. This is a perfect example of an experience that a company can transform with their culture.

Companies that recognize that moms are returning to work as a different person, with a new identity, can turn that valley into a peak. Realizing that a working parent might need flexibility to thrive – but also acknowledging that being a parent makes you a better professional (more empathetic, better at multi-tasking, and better at time management) – can create a company culture where a working mom feels supported on her return to work instead of guilty and demoralized.

Consider the team’s needs, too

When thinking about how to best create a culture that is welcoming to working mothers, we often overlook the needs of her team – many of whom are going to be without a team member for three months or more while the mom is on leave. I had a friend who shared her pregnancy news with her boss, and the reaction she got was awkward silence, as though he wasn’t sure of what to do.

This didn’t feel good for her – and likely didn’t feel great for her boss, either. As an organization, ensure you are creating concepts that solve the pain points not only for the working mother, but for her entire team, because their actions will also affect her experience.

Working motherhood has received plenty of attention over the course of the pandemic, as so many of its challenges have come to stark light as childcare has grown scarce, school has been canceled, and companies’ remote work policies have blended home and office. As we begin to return to a sense of normalcy, we have an opportunity to transform the experience that working mothers have when they come back from maternity leave.

Jossy Lee is the founder of woom and the author of the forthcoming book Mommy Goes To Work. She is an MIT-trained entrepreneur and a mommy who goes to work! She pioneered in nurturing mission-driven innovation at one of Asia’s first social venture funds. She spearheaded new initiatives for EF Education First, Chineasy, NEIA, and MIT. When she is not busy making the changes she wants to see in the world, she enjoys little moments with her family in Boston and Taipei.