Why paternity leave matters, and 4 ways to make it real
Even when employers do have paternity leave policies, cultural norms often discourage fathers from taking full advantage of them.
Fathers don’t really talk about paternity leave, and that’s unfortunate — not only for them, but also for their families and the companies they work for. Why? Because as one recent article in Slate that made this claim concluded, “The burdens of postpartum life shouldn’t belong only to mothers; neither, then, should the act of giving voice to the experience.”
So let’s talk about it, right here and right now.
Parental leave benefits in the United States are deplorable by the standards of the rest of the developed world — it is the only wealthy country in the world where federal law does not guarantee paid time off for new parents. The federal Family and Medical Leave Act (FMLA) only requires companies to grant new parents 12 weeks of unpaid parental leave. Further, the law applies only to public agencies, public and private elementary and secondary schools, and companies with 50 or more employees. (An effort by the Biden administration to adopt more generous laws was recently rebuffed by a narrow margin in the U.S. Senate.)
Related: Millennial dads ask for paternity leave
While federal laws still fall short of the standards of most of the rest of the developed world, more women than men in the United States are taking advantage of what parental leave they can count on from their employers or state laws. In 2018, the most recent year for which data is available, 17% of women in the labor force took leave under the Family and Medical Leave Act (FMLA) during a single year, according to the U.S. Department of Labor. By contrast, 14% of men took FMLA leave. One in four employees who took FMLA leave (25%) did so for reasons related to the birth of a new child. But while women took an average of 35 days off, the average among men was only 21 days.
The actual numbers may in fact be higher. The federal data does not include gender non-conforming individuals or same-sex couples. So it’s not a perfect picture, but it nonetheless puts some numbers behind the premise of the Slate article — that new fathers don’t take as much time off as they could or should.
This isn’t an issue only affecting new fathers and their partners. It also affects their employers and their families over the short term. One study found that paid paternity leave had a positive impact on stress, fatigue, and depression in both new fathers and their partners. These effects can be long-reaching as well. Research published in 2019 found that even nine years after their fathers had taken at least two weeks of paternity leave after they were born, the children reported feeling closer to their fathers than children with fathers who did not take leave.
Taking time off for the birth of a child can positively impact a parent’s productivity and retention at work. A 2020 study of working fathers by McKinsey found that dads felt “more motivated” after taking paternity leave and were considering staying with their organizations longer after returning from leave to be with their family and new child. They also said paternity leave led them to change the way they work — that they became more productive and prioritized their time better.
So, it’s in the best interest of employers to encourage fathers to take paternity leave. Yet even when employers do have paternity leave policies, cultural norms often discourage fathers from taking full advantage of them: 20% of men in the McKinsey study said they feared a career setback if they took paternity leave.
As more and more fathers look after their mental health, and with the combined impacts of the pandemic and more people working from home and seeking greater work-life balance, it’s fair to assume that more men will expect greater support from their employers around new-child care — or they are likely to find employers who do offer a more gender-neutral culture of caring. Here are four steps you can take to support the new fathers in your company.
1. Change culture, not just policy
Federal law sets the minimum paternity leave companies must allow. You as an employer can offer more. Think about why you should. Although you may incur greater costs in the short term by offering enhanced paternity leave benefits, in the long term you are likely to reap greater employee happiness, loyalty, and productivity. (And don’t forget that paternity leave is a benefit that supports and nourishes entire families, not just the employee.)
Of course, even the most generous policies are not helpful if people do not use them.
The 2020 McKinsey survey of working fathers concluded that “having the right policy in place wasn’t sufficient if the work culture looked down on them for taking time off.” A work culture like that is a retrograde way of looking at the world. It not only tells new dads to prioritize their work above everything else, but it also assumes — wrongly — that skipping paternity leave makes a new father a better worker. That’s not true. One new father in the study said, for example, that time off led him to change his personal network of friends and acquaintances, “to work more closely with other parents who have a similar focus, identifying sponsors who can help plan a path back that balances both family and career.”
As an employer, you can signal that your culture embraces paternity leave by embracing those who take it — as well as ensuring that their career paths don’t languish when they return to the workforce.
2. Nurture micro-moments of self-care
Even if a new dad doesn’t take the time off he deserves or is entitled to, every new father can build their schedules differently after a new child arrives. As an employer or HR leader, you can help encourage new dads to take these actions. As one childcare expert put it, “I invite people to take micro moments of self-care … So the relentlessness you felt yesterday might not be such a big deal today, because you took that time out for yourself, and it sort of has a ripple effect.”
As an employer, you can provide more flexibility to new fathers so they can build time into their schedules to take care of their children, their partners, or themselves — by going to the gym, talking to a therapist, or maybe just taking that much-needed nap.
3. Use paternity leave to attract talent
In addition to improving the employee experience in your organization, creating a company culture that embraces paternity leave can help you attract the best candidates to join you. Companies like Netflix, which offers all new parents to take up to the first year off, “have made paid family leave a central plank of their benefits package,” according to the Financial Times. Netflix is also among the recognized companies that have expanded parental leave in terms of the amount of time they allow and who is eligible for the benefit, including transgender employees and others who are not traditional biological parents of new children coming into the home.
The strategy can be a critical selling point for job seekers who are looking for work arrangements that respect the newfound flexibility that the pandemic has afforded them. It can also help you keep your current employees. Nearly 1 in 5 men (19%) in one study said they would look for a new job if their current one did not have sufficient paternity leave in place.
4. Treat your employees like people
It may be hard for some employers to admit, work is only one part of people’s lives. The more you can let them be people first, and employees second, the more likely your employees will remain loyal, productive, and happy. Paternity leave policies that are meaningful and supported by a culture that prioritizes them are a big part of that.
For new fathers, being offered and taking time off to help care for and nourish a new child can mean all the difference — almost as much as taking that much-needed nap.
Read more: