The critical role of having a best friend at work

As an anthropologist turned user researcher, I’m fascinated by human connections at work. In a time where career dominates a significant portion of our lives, but distributed work has created physical disconnection, it’s more important than ever to have strong relationships with our colleagues.

People spend most of their time with family and friends in their younger lives. By age 35, these patterns significantly shift, with individuals spending a growing percentage of time with coworkers — even more than their own partners! The average worker spends nearly 82,000 hours, or over nine years, at work. If we’re going to spend the majority of our days with our teammates, it’s critical we form meaningful relationships with them.

Plus, we know that human connections are critical to wellbeing. The Harvard Study of Adult Development conducted the longest in-depth longitudinal study on human life — ever. The results were simple, yet deep: The key to health and happiness is good relationships. Naturally, this includes relationships at work too.

Having a best friend at work is critical for both employee wellbeing and performance. Recent Gallup data echoes this, stating that having a best friend at work is strongly correlated with engagement, safety, retention, and business outcomes. Let’s dive into the reasons why employees seek best friends at work and how these relationships reshape workplace dynamics.

Why we need companionship at work

In today’s corporate world, where technology dominates how we communicate — is a thumbs-up emoji on Slack enough? Or a wave on Zoom? — the need for genuine human connections remains persistent.

Here’s why:

• Friendship provides support and safety: Best friends at work provide a unique form of social support. They become confidants in difficult times, whether it’s stress regarding a complex project or a personal challenge at home. Having a friend at work creates the necessary space for employees to express frustrations and joys without judgment. This emotional safety net reduces anxiety and fosters a sense of belonging.
• Relationships foster collaboration: Collaboration is no longer confined to teams alone. Strong friendships provide an authentic type of teamwork, fueling honest discussions, productive brainstorms, and constructive critiques. For example, I’m on the product team and have a friend on the marketing team. This has helped strengthen ties between our two departments that may have otherwise stayed siloed. This synergy leads to more innovative problem-solving and collective growth.
• Friends spark motivation and solidarity: Best friends in the workplace are motivators! Their encouragement and camaraderie act as positive fuel that can enhance morale and foster commitment to projects and objectives. Plus, working with your friends can drive a sense of solidarity to succeed together.
• Companionship enables work-life balance: Not having a balanced life can quickly lead to burnout. A contributor to burnout is having consistently negative interactions; on the flip side, good interactions with friends are a great and easy way to inject positivity into work. Friends who can hop on a quick Zoom chat or tell you about their day over Slack provide an opportunity to refresh and recharge. This helps reduce work-related stress and promote overall wellbeing.
• Friends reduce stress: Friendships, no matter where they are formed, alleviate stress. Strong bonds at work provide an outlet for discussing challenges, making collaboration more fun, and, in turn, elevating engagement levels. And that’s especially important today, with the U.S. reporting the highest regional percentage of daily stress, according to Gallup’s 2023 State of the Workplace Report.

The business benefit of a best friend

The relationship between best friends at work and employee engagement is undeniable and it showcases how our core need for connection influences workplace dynamics. Gallup’s research, mentioned above, found that when 60% of employees in a company have a work best friend, safety incidents decreased by 36%, customer engagement increased by 7%, and profits increased by 12%. Innovation, creativity, and having fun at work also increased.

If that’s not enough, employees who have a best friend at work are less likely to leave the job, more likely to recommend the job, and more likely to be satisfied with the job. Win-win-win.

Leaders have a role to play in fostering healthy relationships, too. Data from behavioral psychology shows that leaders who prioritize relationship-building and lead from a place of respect and kindness foster cultures of engagement and satisfaction.

The takeaway

Helping employees feel motivated and engaged requires more than a good paycheck and competitive benefits. Companies need to be intentional about fostering human connections, despite losing in-person connections. Don’t just take my word for it: high-touch, a concept by John Naisbitt, says that technology succeeds depending on the way humans interact with it. The more we rely on tech, the more intentional we have to be about injecting human touch points for connection — so both humans find fulfillment and society can advance.

Related: Recognizing signs of unhappiness and empowering a joyful workplace

Belongingness is deeply embedded in our history. Best friends at work help satisfy this core need. By enabling these bonds, organizations tap into the anthropological underpinnings of human connection, fostering job satisfaction, strengthening company cultures, and providing a deep sense of belonging.

Alessandra Adorisio, lead user researcher, Bonusly